


Dream

by hatebeat



Category: L'Arc~en~Ciel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-14
Updated: 2013-01-14
Packaged: 2017-11-25 12:32:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/638938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hatebeat/pseuds/hatebeat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ken thinks about what's true.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dream

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written back in 2007.

He couldn't stop thinking about what Yacchan had said. Yacchan knew this shit, right? He always had, he'd always been the one out of all of them who knew best, right? Well, Tetchan knew best when it came to business or financial things, but... Musically, Sakura was the one that knew what was going on, even from the very beginning.

Ken thought they probably still wouldn't have gotten anywhere without Sakura's help, but they didn't talk about that kind of thing. Didn't really talk about Sakura at all. Not in terms of having ever been in the band, at least.

It was taboo, or something like that.

But Ken was having so much fun! Being in a band like this again, being in a band where he could just have fun and be himself, and best of all he could _shine_ like he never had before. Though, it was really hard to sing while playing the guitar, but it was fun, too. Playing with Yacchan again... man, it was great! They were really compatible, and all. Him and Sakura.

Still, Sakura's words were in his head, still. And he didn't get it. Why it bothered him. He just didn't understand. It wasn't even because it was kind of an insult to L'Arc. He didn't care about that, it was something else, something nagging at him inside.

 

He was headed over to Tetsu's place. They'd been kind of fighting for a while, but they'd made up, at least. It was good, 'cause Ken really needed someone to talk to! Well, at least about what Sakura said. Couldn't really tell Hyde about it at all, and Hyde was too busy for friends or whatever anyway. Kind of sucked. But it also kind of proved what Yacchan had said.

Ken was fuckin' confused.

 _"Does it bother you?"_ Sakura had asked him. And Ken knew Sakura wouldn't have said something like this to Tetchan or Hyde, because he cared too much about hurting their feelings. He must have known Ken wouldn't have been that way about it, because... well, Yacchan always knew that kind of thing! And he was right, too...

_"Does it bother you? That you've become sellouts?"_

It didn't seem like something Sakura would say, but maybe it needed to be said. Ken hadn't realised it, but maybe Sakura was right.

Wasn't that why he wasn't in the band anymore? But Sakura still had a lot of fun with Ken! See? Because S.O.A.P. was awesome! They were having the time of their lives!

Maybe...

 

He tapped his fingers against the wall of the elevator as it rose up to Tetsu's floor. Though, with Tetsu's record, Ken would be lucky if he still lived there, sheesh! Seriously, though, he wanted to talk to Tetsu about this! So he had told Tetsu he was coming over, though Tetchan sounded a little nervous about it or something on the phone, but Ken told him he was coming anyway! Tetchan should be a better host...

When he knocked on the door, it took Tetsu a long time to answer, which Ken thought was a little rude, seeing as they'd been best friends since they were kids, plus he'd even given Tetsu prior notice. But Tetsu answered the door, and his hair was wet and stuff. He looked kind of like he hadn't been sleeping well, bags under his eyes and stuff. Well, Tetchan stressed out too much! Ken was always telling him to relax.

"Heya, Kenchan..." Tetsu said to him, seeming a little nervous or tired or something. Tired was understandable, but not nervous, so.

"Hey. Can I come in?" Tetsu was just kind of standing in the doorway... Was that how he was supposed to act with his best friend? Oh, maybe Tetsu was still mad at him... Damn, he thought they were over that! Tetsu nodded and stepped out of the doorway, though, so Ken came right in and kicked his shoes off.

"How's your band?" Tetsu asked him quietly, but then he grinned at Ken.

"Oh, you know. Fun." That was the problem, though, right? But see, Ken had fun with L'Arc, still. Wasn't that fine? But he thought maybe... well, the other guys, were they still having fun? Ken didn't know. It sometimes didn't seem like it.

Especially playing with Yacchan again, he was having the most fun he'd had in years! But he couldn't say that to Tetchan. It would hurt his feelings.

"Tetchan, are we sellouts?"

Tetsu kind of stared at him for a minute, and Ken couldn't figure out what the look on his face meant, but it probably wasn't a great thing. Shit.

"Why, did Sakura say that?" Tetsu asked him after a moment, and even Ken could feel the bitterness in Tetsu's voice. Also kinda sounded like he might cry. Damn... But Ken needed to talk to someone about it! Who else was he supposed to talk to if not Tetchan?

He came in out of the doorway, and leaned on the wall at the entrance to the living room. Maybe they could take this more... well, inside? Would be good...

"Well, kinda..." But Ken had to flinch a little when he saw that look on Tetchan's face! Man. "He asked if it bothered me."

"Well does it?" Tetsu snapped back at him.

Ken sighed, and went over to Tetsu's couch, flopping down on it and making himself at home.

"I didn't think we were sellouts," he said simply.

Tetsu was quiet for a minute. Ken thought he might say a number of different things, but when he did finally speak, Ken wasn't expecting that answer at all.

"Yeah, we are."

Ken knew Tetsu had a dream. He always had. And... it wasn't that different from Sakura's dreams, either. Ken understood that. And he knew it got a little bit skewed. If Tetsu thought they were sellouts, too...

"But we're still doing what we love, right?" Tetsu asked, coming over to the couch. He sat down carefully next to Ken, and Ken slipped his arm around him, letting Tetsu put his head on Ken's shoulder.

"I thought so..." Ken said with a sigh.

Tetsu said it was okay. So it must have been. But Ken knew, too... Tetsu missed their dream more than any of them.


End file.
